I’m back from a trip up north filled with family and bookended with long periods of driving. And driving always seems to make me contemplative and quiet. And I haven’t really shaken that feeling since I got back.
I am feeling the need to simplify. And simplify. And simplify. A need to find where my head is right now (I’ve been a little restless and edgy lately for some reason) and where to go next, if anywhere. It feels a bit like an identity crisis. But crisis isn’t the right word. An identity solidifying maybe. Or an identity direction search. I’m just trying to observe what’s making me uncomfortable and then let it go so I can live it…
I came home to weeds in my garden and set about pulling them one by one. I started to get a little antsy because it was taking a while and I was starting to get hot, so I tried to pull out handfuls at a time. But it didn’t work. Only the leaves came off when I did that… no roots. So I went back to pulling them out one by one, making sure to get the roots. And I laughed at myself because it felt like something I keep learning again and again: focus, be there now… Do one thing at a time and make sure you go down deep. When you start to do too much at once or focus on too many changes at a time, you never really get to the heart of it. It’s just surfacey and non-productive if you don’t look at each thing on its own. You gotta get the roots.